One-third life crisis?

By Rebecca Earley

I believe my friends and I are going through what we could call a “one-third life crisis.” We are past the quarter life mark now, just approaching 30, and we all seem to be struggling to answer the same question: “What is this all really about?”

I was always the “golden child” growing up. Studied hard, got good grades, never skipped class, took dance lessons 3-4 times a week, and was only grounded once in high school. I was accepted into the college of my dreams (go Heels!), got my first job in the city of my dreams (NYC!) and then finally accomplished my life long dream of living in France. But now what? Good question.

For the first time in my life, I actually feel lost. Not in the deepest sense, as in I’ll never find myself again, but all of a sudden life has gotten much harder, and something tells me that it’s only the beginning.

Nearly all of my dearest friends are going through something similar. We are experiencing some of life’s most glorious gifts and greatest challenges simultaneously, and we are not sure how to react. Life suddenly feels fragile, when we always thought ourselves invincible. And all the while we have that big number “30” leaning over our shoulders, asking us to list our “accomplishments.”

How did we miss this chapter during our straight A studies? Is this the result of being part of the Millennial “trophy” generation? We were always rewarded the shiny, gold trophy for our hard work and efforts, but what does the gold trophy really mean? It feels empty.

We all seem to be searching for a greater meaning. A greater meaning to work, a greater meaning to our relationships, a greater meaning to our everyday lives. We are suddenly more aware of our ephemeral nature, and it’s an “existential bummer”.

I recently watched this TED Talk, “The Power of Vulnerability,” by Brené Brown. She found through research that the people who feel the most joy and worth in their life are those who fully embrace vulnerability. Instead of being afraid of it, like most of us, they wholeheartedly believe that it is an essential part of life.

I, admittedly, fall under the category of people who run away like hell from vulnerability. I have essentially ignored my emotions the majority of my life, afraid of the potential “consequences” of feeling them. Lately I have been going through the excruciating exercise of actually listening to them. The result is that through listening to my inner self, I’m finally discovering who I am and what I really want out of this short and precious life. I guess Brené Brown is really on to something.

As I continue my journey to discover more about myself before entering this next big stage of my life, I pledge to embrace vulnerability. I pledge to embrace vulnerability in the same way that I embraced it when I submitted my “My Paris Story” chapter to Dawn, and just the way that all of the “My Paris Story” authors did when they chose to live the life they always dreamed. I may get hurt, and I will most likely stumble (fall), but something tells me that it will bring me closer to the answer we are all seeking.